Here and gone

July 16, 2014 § Leave a comment

I didn’t expect to be absent for so long, and I will disappear again. I suppose it is my way. My apologies to you. 

We have been getting by on the spousal support fantastically. We are super careful, but so much grinding worry is gone. I actually forgot about tax season entirely. Which is a huge change as it was a continuing stressor, and now it is not at all. 

The garden has been developed more. We broke open an older  overgrown garden bed and filled it with around twenty roses, interspersed with other plants. 

Our white cat needed to be euthanized for cancer in March.

Then ten days ago, we euthanized our Persian cat, who was the light of my life, the joy and softness of my day for nearly a full decade. He was my Kitten General, all five pounds of him, a calm dominate cat. Much like Cesar Milan’s Rottweiler named Daddy. He gave overflowing sweetness to me that I needed and can never repay.

We held as him as he died, brought him home, held him, cuddled him, washed (and blow dried!) him, and buried him in a high dry spot in our garden. We wrapped him in turquoise silk and pink linen. We filled the hole with lavender I tore by the handfuls from lower in the garden. He loved that lavender.

He has not left me, I see his grave everyday, and as I type this. He was the best cat. He slept on my chest or with his head on my arm, beside me in my bed for so long. I honour the gift he gave to me of his presence. 

Thanks for listening. 


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