Private – Grief
October 24, 2012 § 13 Comments
Two years ago on this date, I had exploratory surgery for cancer. Four hours in surgery and three in recovery. They told me that among other things, my cervix was ruined and my uterus would never hold a child.
When you wake up from surgery you never know what they will tell you. You can’t ever know how your heart will break and never heal. I know that there are people waking up in a hospital right now that are being told that their family is all dead, or their legs were removed. And you just have to deal with it.
I have to pretend it never happened because there is a constant scream in my head. I can hear it and it has the power to drown me. A siren call for my ears alone. I grieve.